We brought Hannah to the pool yesterday. It was great fun! I think I was more excited than her initially but I managed to rub off some excitement on her! :)
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Monday, November 16, 2009
:(
J came by today and though we are more of business aquaintance, she poured out her heart to me. Well... maybe she needed an additional avenue to let that hurt and anger flow. Betrayal, hurt and simply the fact that she has sacrificed everything she had did not seem to pay off at all. My heart went out to her.
8 years of courtship, two decades of marriage... a seemingly blissful family completed with children ended with the appearance of another party. The pain in her eyes and her tone when she spoke. The hurt that she tried to conceal. The anger in her speech. My heart went out to her.
Wasn't she once a beautiful bride filled with joy in her eyes as she said that marriage vow?
Wasn't she once full of hope and pride when she presented to her parents " This is the man I want to marry."
Wasn't she the one who as a little girl looked forward to being a bride don with a long train and veil?
Wasn't she the one who was willing to give up all that she had for the family whom she was willing to lay her life down?
Something within me broke.
She regretted her decision. Felt that she did not deserve all that.
She certainly does not.
What is our world coming to?
I pray that Hannah will find someone who will stay true to her someday. That she will marry someone who will cherish her and love her not for a few decades but for as long as she lives. Someone who despite all odds, will hold on to her hand and finish the path that they vow to do so.
Seriously... if not... I'd rather she stays single and stay with me always.
8 years of courtship, two decades of marriage... a seemingly blissful family completed with children ended with the appearance of another party. The pain in her eyes and her tone when she spoke. The hurt that she tried to conceal. The anger in her speech. My heart went out to her.
Wasn't she once a beautiful bride filled with joy in her eyes as she said that marriage vow?
Wasn't she once full of hope and pride when she presented to her parents " This is the man I want to marry."
Wasn't she the one who as a little girl looked forward to being a bride don with a long train and veil?
Wasn't she the one who was willing to give up all that she had for the family whom she was willing to lay her life down?
Something within me broke.
She regretted her decision. Felt that she did not deserve all that.
She certainly does not.
What is our world coming to?
I pray that Hannah will find someone who will stay true to her someday. That she will marry someone who will cherish her and love her not for a few decades but for as long as she lives. Someone who despite all odds, will hold on to her hand and finish the path that they vow to do so.
Seriously... if not... I'd rather she stays single and stay with me always.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
It wasn't that long ago...
My Family on 9th June 2007
Ever since then... there were more additions to the family.
Chloe, my niece (16Jan 2008)
Hannah, my baby(16 Feb 2009)
The extra extra pounds I've put on since then:(
Monday, November 2, 2009
To train or not to train
I finally understood Hamlet's dilemma... to be caught in between.
Well, I guess there has been sufficient theories to support both camp.
And after much disruption, we've reached a point of desperation. - Well, almost.
I thought I needed a break from the crazy bedtime (if you call it) routine.
Lie on the bed with Hannah and praying to God that she sleeps. But to my dismay she'll be tossing and turning about and playing peek-a-boo with me although her eyes are red with fatigue. Then after an hour, she finally cried and fell asleep. Carried her gingerly to her cot and keeping the house in TOTAL silence in fear that we might wake the princess up. 2 hours. We thought it's time we can go to bed. Princess brawls! Comfort her... to the brink of frustration. Slept. 2 hours...3 hours... the cycle repeats.
Verdict, no sleep for mummy. No sleep for baby. Resulted in frustrated mummy and cranky baby.
So, hoping that the training works (thanks Daze, it did! xxx)
We hardened our hearts and said goodnight and planted a million kisses on Hannah before leaving her to sleep on her own. She cried... with tears and mucus and perspiration! We took turns to comfort her every 5 minutes by telling her we are here. More kisses.
First night: 45 minutes
Second night: 30 minutes
Third night: 20 mintes
fourth night: 10 minutes
fifth night: 15 minutes
sixth night: 10 minutes.....
recently: 5 minutes or less.
WOW! I am liberated! Thank God! It is suc a joy.
But now she started to fuss in the middle of the night. 2am, 3am, 5am...
Time to train her again.
I really hope she can achieve her 12 hours of night sleep as a baby should soon.
As the bimbo in America's Top model said: Keep my fingers crossed, my toes crossed, butt cheeks crossed! ....
Well, I guess there has been sufficient theories to support both camp.
And after much disruption, we've reached a point of desperation. - Well, almost.
I thought I needed a break from the crazy bedtime (if you call it) routine.
Lie on the bed with Hannah and praying to God that she sleeps. But to my dismay she'll be tossing and turning about and playing peek-a-boo with me although her eyes are red with fatigue. Then after an hour, she finally cried and fell asleep. Carried her gingerly to her cot and keeping the house in TOTAL silence in fear that we might wake the princess up. 2 hours. We thought it's time we can go to bed. Princess brawls! Comfort her... to the brink of frustration. Slept. 2 hours...3 hours... the cycle repeats.
Verdict, no sleep for mummy. No sleep for baby. Resulted in frustrated mummy and cranky baby.
So, hoping that the training works (thanks Daze, it did! xxx)
We hardened our hearts and said goodnight and planted a million kisses on Hannah before leaving her to sleep on her own. She cried... with tears and mucus and perspiration! We took turns to comfort her every 5 minutes by telling her we are here. More kisses.
First night: 45 minutes
Second night: 30 minutes
Third night: 20 mintes
fourth night: 10 minutes
fifth night: 15 minutes
sixth night: 10 minutes.....
recently: 5 minutes or less.
WOW! I am liberated! Thank God! It is suc a joy.
But now she started to fuss in the middle of the night. 2am, 3am, 5am...
Time to train her again.
I really hope she can achieve her 12 hours of night sleep as a baby should soon.
As the bimbo in America's Top model said: Keep my fingers crossed, my toes crossed, butt cheeks crossed! ....
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
At long Last
It has been a long month. So much has happened I think it's surreal!
And finally the dust has settled a little ( i hope) and I can sit before the laptop to update this long forgotten blog. :) --> If anyone is still following, that is...
It started with Hannah's teething. She was really fussy and cranky. Two teeth sprouted.
Then we realised she had a growth at the side of her neck. Called the doctor thinking that it was a mump... but was advised to see a doc immediately. We rushed down to the night clinic before it closed at 9pm and was told the BAD news that it could be a lymphnode infection. Apparently, it could be a big thing if it is serious enough. And since it was already 9 odd, we were given the green light to go home to monitor Hannah till the next morning before going for an ultrasound scan.
That night was long. We were instructed to admit her straight into the hospital should she developes a fever. Thank God she did not have a rise in temperature although the sleep was very much disturbed.
The next day, we went to MT A. Saw two PDs and was told to prepare for her admission. :( Did Ultrasound, had to put her on IV. There were 4 swollen lymphnodes and among those one was the size of a ping pong ball and had pus in it. The only ways to remove the pus were: 1) antibiotics through IV 2) operate 3) Use ultrasound and syringe to remove the pus. The non-invasive was definitely the preferred one. We were told that if it showed no progress then we have to consider option 2 or 3.
We stayed 10 days in the hospital. It was crazy being cooped up in the room 24/7. Tiring to entertain her all the time and had very disturbed sleep because she had to go on type A drip every 4 hours and type B every 6 hourly. Each taking 30 mins. Hubby got to juggle work and hospital. Thank God our parents came by to help babysit and entertain her while we take a breather. We didn't have many visitors because the Doc advised against having contacts because her immunity was down and she cannot afford to be exposed to any other virus to complicate things.
Anyway to cut the long story short, we went home after 10 days. Relieved.
BUT the part 2 starts then. Hannah being so used to me in the room with her for 10 days and nights... started this 'stick to mummy' syndrome. I could not leave her an inch without her crying. We sat side by side, I stood up, she cries. I walked to kitchen, she cries. I stood to adjust the fan, she cries. It was madness. And knowing that she was still not totally well, we kind of accomodated her. I was on the verge of a mental breakdown! (well, almost :P) Goodness...
FInally somehow she became better. We decided to train her to be independent again. Then... she woke up with a fever the next day. Then she had false measles! She recovered and I was sick. I recovered and I hurt my back playing and carrying her...
WOW... That's the last thing that has happened. WE finally made it to church after a month.
It has really been non-stop action! ha...
But though these moments, Hannah has learnt to sit from lying position and now, crawl:)
She can now say mamamammamam though I think with no linkage to my identity. She can now give you a 'five' when you ask for it and she can show you what 'no-no' means. (well, she'll shake her head).
I've done up her nursery (except some parts of the door still not painted) she's sleeping in there now. Will update with a picture soon.
Till then. Thank God for He's always been around for us come what may. And I guess going through all these downs as husband and wife has made as more resilient. And we know how precious is it Hannah is to us. And we treasure support from family and friends indefinitely. :)
Kudos to you who went through that crazy moments with us.
And finally the dust has settled a little ( i hope) and I can sit before the laptop to update this long forgotten blog. :) --> If anyone is still following, that is...
It started with Hannah's teething. She was really fussy and cranky. Two teeth sprouted.
Then we realised she had a growth at the side of her neck. Called the doctor thinking that it was a mump... but was advised to see a doc immediately. We rushed down to the night clinic before it closed at 9pm and was told the BAD news that it could be a lymphnode infection. Apparently, it could be a big thing if it is serious enough. And since it was already 9 odd, we were given the green light to go home to monitor Hannah till the next morning before going for an ultrasound scan.
That night was long. We were instructed to admit her straight into the hospital should she developes a fever. Thank God she did not have a rise in temperature although the sleep was very much disturbed.
The next day, we went to MT A. Saw two PDs and was told to prepare for her admission. :( Did Ultrasound, had to put her on IV. There were 4 swollen lymphnodes and among those one was the size of a ping pong ball and had pus in it. The only ways to remove the pus were: 1) antibiotics through IV 2) operate 3) Use ultrasound and syringe to remove the pus. The non-invasive was definitely the preferred one. We were told that if it showed no progress then we have to consider option 2 or 3.
We stayed 10 days in the hospital. It was crazy being cooped up in the room 24/7. Tiring to entertain her all the time and had very disturbed sleep because she had to go on type A drip every 4 hours and type B every 6 hourly. Each taking 30 mins. Hubby got to juggle work and hospital. Thank God our parents came by to help babysit and entertain her while we take a breather. We didn't have many visitors because the Doc advised against having contacts because her immunity was down and she cannot afford to be exposed to any other virus to complicate things.
Anyway to cut the long story short, we went home after 10 days. Relieved.
BUT the part 2 starts then. Hannah being so used to me in the room with her for 10 days and nights... started this 'stick to mummy' syndrome. I could not leave her an inch without her crying. We sat side by side, I stood up, she cries. I walked to kitchen, she cries. I stood to adjust the fan, she cries. It was madness. And knowing that she was still not totally well, we kind of accomodated her. I was on the verge of a mental breakdown! (well, almost :P) Goodness...
FInally somehow she became better. We decided to train her to be independent again. Then... she woke up with a fever the next day. Then she had false measles! She recovered and I was sick. I recovered and I hurt my back playing and carrying her...
WOW... That's the last thing that has happened. WE finally made it to church after a month.
It has really been non-stop action! ha...
But though these moments, Hannah has learnt to sit from lying position and now, crawl:)
She can now say mamamammamam though I think with no linkage to my identity. She can now give you a 'five' when you ask for it and she can show you what 'no-no' means. (well, she'll shake her head).
I've done up her nursery (except some parts of the door still not painted) she's sleeping in there now. Will update with a picture soon.
Till then. Thank God for He's always been around for us come what may. And I guess going through all these downs as husband and wife has made as more resilient. And we know how precious is it Hannah is to us. And we treasure support from family and friends indefinitely. :)
Kudos to you who went through that crazy moments with us.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
I must blog about this.
I must just blog about this to air my anger( which has actually fizzled off)
The other day, I decided to take a cab with Hannah to Parkway for a walk before meeting hubby after his work.
So, after lunch, I put Hannah into the pram and went downstairs to hail a cab. Within minutes, a cab came along and I was rather glad because the wait wasn't long at all. But my happiness was short-lived! I beckoned the driver to wind down his window and asked if he could help me with the pram. He did not say much. Just alighted from his car and went to open the boot. What do you think you would expect him to do? Well, I don't know about you, I carried Hannah from the pram and expected him to help me with the pram. By that I meant fold the pram and put it into the boot. Well, he didn't! He stood there staring at us! I was half upset and half anxious cos the sky looked a little dark. So I carried Hannah in one arm and attempted to close up the pram with another. Of cos I did not manage to do so. And that driver just looked on! That started my blood boiling a little. I asked nicely if he could just HELP ME WITH THE PRAM. He looked at me and pursed his lips and sauntered over reluctantly. And despite my instruction of " Press this button" He kept pressing the other one that I wasn't pointing to. Which of cos did not help to fold the pram. He got upset and looked at me in disgust and anger! I got upset too and said THIS button. And he finally managed to succeed and I said 'Thanks".
When we reached parkway, there were two lanes. He dropped me at the outer lane from the entrance. I thought he would be kind enough to get the pram out from the boot and put it at the entrance for me. But NO. He took the pram out and again with great unhappiness, just left it right there behind the taxi and walked back to his driver seat with me still unsettled with Hannah in one hand, picking up the cushion of the pram he dropped (with no apologies or attempt to pick it up) and in between two cabs! There is only one phrase to best express my emotions : WA LAU!
The cab behind was kind enough to reverse so that I have more space to settle Hannah down into the pram and that thoughtless driver obviously drove off! Talk about kind gestures and world-class service! It embarrass me to acknowledge that such is our fellow Singaporean! Anyway I settled Hannah into the pram and moved towards the entrance. There were two steps leading up and I could not carry the Pram up! I asked a lady who was standing right beside me to help me. Thank God she did so. I was fuming mad by the time I got into the building.
Hello, I am not asking for much am I? All I asked is for him to realise that I cannot carry the baby and put the pram into the boot without his help. And I would expect some form of kindness, thoughtfulness or civic mindedness at least? I mean, isn't it obvious that I needed some help there?
I am not being disloyal to Singapore. I love Singapore and I am glad to be a Singaporean. But i must agree with my expat friend: That Singaporeans are not malicious. They are nice people. But generally not very thoughtful.
I add- not to strangers at least.
sigh.
The other day, I decided to take a cab with Hannah to Parkway for a walk before meeting hubby after his work.
So, after lunch, I put Hannah into the pram and went downstairs to hail a cab. Within minutes, a cab came along and I was rather glad because the wait wasn't long at all. But my happiness was short-lived! I beckoned the driver to wind down his window and asked if he could help me with the pram. He did not say much. Just alighted from his car and went to open the boot. What do you think you would expect him to do? Well, I don't know about you, I carried Hannah from the pram and expected him to help me with the pram. By that I meant fold the pram and put it into the boot. Well, he didn't! He stood there staring at us! I was half upset and half anxious cos the sky looked a little dark. So I carried Hannah in one arm and attempted to close up the pram with another. Of cos I did not manage to do so. And that driver just looked on! That started my blood boiling a little. I asked nicely if he could just HELP ME WITH THE PRAM. He looked at me and pursed his lips and sauntered over reluctantly. And despite my instruction of " Press this button" He kept pressing the other one that I wasn't pointing to. Which of cos did not help to fold the pram. He got upset and looked at me in disgust and anger! I got upset too and said THIS button. And he finally managed to succeed and I said 'Thanks".
When we reached parkway, there were two lanes. He dropped me at the outer lane from the entrance. I thought he would be kind enough to get the pram out from the boot and put it at the entrance for me. But NO. He took the pram out and again with great unhappiness, just left it right there behind the taxi and walked back to his driver seat with me still unsettled with Hannah in one hand, picking up the cushion of the pram he dropped (with no apologies or attempt to pick it up) and in between two cabs! There is only one phrase to best express my emotions : WA LAU!
The cab behind was kind enough to reverse so that I have more space to settle Hannah down into the pram and that thoughtless driver obviously drove off! Talk about kind gestures and world-class service! It embarrass me to acknowledge that such is our fellow Singaporean! Anyway I settled Hannah into the pram and moved towards the entrance. There were two steps leading up and I could not carry the Pram up! I asked a lady who was standing right beside me to help me. Thank God she did so. I was fuming mad by the time I got into the building.
Hello, I am not asking for much am I? All I asked is for him to realise that I cannot carry the baby and put the pram into the boot without his help. And I would expect some form of kindness, thoughtfulness or civic mindedness at least? I mean, isn't it obvious that I needed some help there?
I am not being disloyal to Singapore. I love Singapore and I am glad to be a Singaporean. But i must agree with my expat friend: That Singaporeans are not malicious. They are nice people. But generally not very thoughtful.
I add- not to strangers at least.
sigh.
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